Enlightenment on the Loo

by | Feb 12, 2019 | Uncategorized | 4,565 comments

I want to take you back about 9 years ago, my new partner and I had not long moved in together and life was pretty crazy. Here is a quick snap shot…

5 kids from 8 – 13, two mamma bears, two home based business’ and a part time job. It was crazy and on top of all this we were doing our best to blend our families and find out how we all fit together, how to cope with teenagers, hormones etc. I would have given anything for just a few minutes of silence and could not even let myself dream of a peaceful, restorative 20 minute meditation. I knew that I needed to do something to get my shit together, but that just seemed like too much to ask for. In among this chaos, I remember seeing something coming up on my chunky old desk top computer that said, if I downloaded this program, it would chime for 1 minute every hour, and, if I did this and was still for that minute and used that time to meditate, it would change the energy and feel of my day. Now I just fell in love with this idea, but again… chunky old desk top, 5 kids, a business and a job. How would I even know when it was “my” minute?

I did however take this idea forward with me and when I eventually upgraded my phone a few years later, I was truly over feeling scattered and shitty and decided it was time to do something about it. I sent myself reminders every hour on my phone. They would say things like, “Remember to breathe”, “Today is a good day”, “Be here now”, you know stuff to keep me present and in the moment. This seemed to be going pretty good I thought. I would get my reminder, stop for a moment, breathe, refocus and centre and I was starting to feel the benefits. Then, one morning, I left my phone in the kitchen after doing school lunches and my youngest son heard the phone chime. He had obviously seen the message and was yelling all the way down the stairs “Mum, Mum, your phone, quick, God’s calling.” Now this child knew I had Santa’s number, he knew I had the Tooth Fairy’s number and the Rabbit too, so of course God would be calling me. My first message of the day said… “Good Morning, this is God. I will be handling all of your problems today, and your assistance is not required. Have a beautiful day.” 

I loved that message so much, but what happened next changed everything. You see all the kids thought this was hilarious and EVERY time my phone made a noise there would a chorus of “Mum, God’s calling.” “Chris, God’s calling”. Talk about spoiling the moment and disturbing the stillness. I had to find another way to get my shit together. 

There was one place in the house I visited a lot, a place where no-one followed and I got to be alone and quiet – The Bathroom – yes, benefits of a blended family. This became my sacred space. I would go here regularly (hehehe) to just be. When the shit was hitting the fan, when I was loosing my shit, when shit just got too hard, the bathroom is where you’d find me. 

I would sit, feel my feet on the floor… and go with the flow. I would feel what it is like to let my body do what it does naturally, without efforting. I would just be. 

You see what I know about me and about a lot of other women is that  we are never “just in the bathroom”, we are in a few hundred other places too. We are thinking about dinner, phone calls, clients, washing, how dirty that sink is, ‘shit was I supposed to pick a kid up’ and a multitude of other things. We are very rarely still and quiet. So I consciously decided to do that. To be still and to Be while I Pee. I figured if that was the only time every day I was still, that in itself could change the energy of my day – just like that program had said years earlier – and I do pee often. So I did it, I found enlightenment on the loo and you can too. If you’d like some simple instructions on how to do it, you too will begin to feel the benefits of being while you’re peeing. Email me with, I’d like enlightenment on the loo and I’ll send them through.

It is my mission to change the energy of the planet one bathroom break at a time. So please share this story with your friends, send it on with love from me. 

Chris Shana 

The Shit Shifter. 

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